Major Tom, this is Ground Control. Stop singing and return to base immediately.

Over the last six weeks or so, Jim and I have received a decent amount of correspondence from our rapid teenage girl fanbase (note to the authorities: all emails with a picture are deleted immediately so there is no reason to look at all the other porn on our computers on one of your fishing expeditions) asking us what is up with the lack of updates to the site. For instance, Kara, 14 from Drexel Hill, wrote the following:

Hey guyz? Whtzup?!?! When willz u2 rite a new post? W/B/S. Kara

Well Kara, we do appreciate your concern, but sometimes other aspects of our lives receive more priority than this website. I can't speak for Jim, but I have been so caught up in the battle to determine Zimbabwe's next President that I have pretty much been ignoring sports completely. But I do think I can take a quick break from going over the latest poll data from Masvingo to answer a few questions about the Phillies. First though, I must cease laughing at "heady" David Eckstein getting picked off first in the bottom of the ninth in a tie game with no outs and Alex Rios about to get on base with a walk.

Is Ryan Howard going to turn it around or will he break his own strike out record?

Yes and yes. Howard's current BABIP is .259, which is significantly less than his three year average of .346 from '05-'07. Unless managers have figured out exactly where to play all seven guys in the field when Howard is at bat, the easiest explanation to the drop in BABIP is simply luck. For whatever reason, when Howard puts the ball in play, it is not finding the holes that it did the past three seasons. This number will go up or I'm not the next coach of the Chicago Bulls. His lack of walks is still concerning to me (Howard has two eight game streaks without taking a walk, he had zero such streaks in '07), I think he will start getting more hits in the next few months.

As far as the strikeouts go, Ryan Howard is always going to swing and miss at a lot of baseballs. If he gets ten at bats in a game, which I am predicting will happen August 29 at Wrigley and the Phils will win 32-28, Howard will strike out three times. The strike outs are the necessary evil that come with his insane power. People who suggest that he should choke up or just try to make contact probably need to go reassure their son that even if he isn't the best player on the team, he is still loved, because I'm sure he has his doubts.

Are there any players out there that the Phillies could trade for?

Probably, but it is still very early. I think a big prize will be Brian Fuentes of the Rockies, who is having another great year in that awful ballpark (ERA+ of 184). He only makes $5 million this year and will be a free agent at the end of this season. He would be a great addition to the back of the Phillies bullpen, but I don't know if the Rockies would be willing to take back a lot of guys in A ball because that is all the Phillies can afford to trade.

What can save the Mets season?

Hopefully nothing. Their current situation is much too entertaining for it to stop.

If the season ended on June 9, would Chase Utley be the MVP?

No. But if the baseball season ended on June 9, I think there would be much more important topics to talk about. Like, who is going to take my dollar coins in return for hot dogs later this summer?

Has Pedro Feliz won you over yet?

I am doing my best to ignore how awful he is as a hitter and just focus on the stability that he adds in the field. He does have a rocket for an arm and makes most of the plays he has to. But he is going to end the season with an OPS+ around 80-85 and hopefully the human out machine doesn't hurt them in the playoffs.

Hungry?

Yes. Meeting over.

Season's Over, Part One

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly from the season opener.

The Good: Chase Utley had a nice game at the plate with his first home run and two hits for the day. And he didn't bobble an easy groundball that led to a crucial run like another star player on the team who plays a middle infield position, but will remain nameless.

The Bad: Charlie Manuel continues to make me question why MLB teams have humans managing them and not monkeys. He is probably going to catch a lot of heat for pulling JC Romero for Tom Gordon, but that is one of those situations where he is only right if it works. If Romero stays in and gives up a ton of runs, then he is an idiot for not brining in Gordon. It is too early to stretch these relievers out.

My problem was his decision in the first inning of the first game of the year to have Victorino bunt Rollins over to third with no one out. The only way this decision makes sense is if one of the following is true:

• The Phillies offense is terrible
  
• The Phillies pitching staff is good enough to hold a one run lead for the next eight innings.
• It is 1948 and all the town is buzzing about how Thomas Dewey is going to make a great President.

It just boggles my mind that they would be playing for one run in the home opener in the first inning. The bottom of their order is not exactly Murderer's Row, so the Phillies need to squeeze every bit of offense from Rollins/Victorino/Utley/Howard/Burrell as possible. Sacrificing Victorino to move Utley over to third does not fall into that category.

The Ugly: Tom Gordon and his 135.01 ERA. I really enjoy it for the first week or so when pitchers have to carry around these monstrous ERAs after one or two bad outings. And Gordon was bad. Hopefully he can get one more year out of that arm of his or Brad Lidge has a time machine. Otherwise the last few innings are not going to be pleasant to watch.

---------
Pedro Feliz is going to be the whipping boy this year, at least here. And he did nothing to prove us wrong today, going 0-4 with two strikeouts, a double play, and leaving three guys on base. But hey, he might hit 20 home runs and everyone knows how awesome home runs are!!!

This is an Offense

To follow up on last week, the Phillies are now averaging an astounding 5.50 runs per game. The Marlins, who are still second in runs per game, are avergaing 4.89 runs per game. For the mathematically inclined, the Phillies are leading every team in the NL by over 0.6 runs per game. That is quite a number.

And because they have been getting halfway decent pitching of late, they are winning more than they are losing.

These next four games are a big test as they face the Cubs who have the best rotation in the NL that isn't fronted by Jake Peavy. Fortunately they don't have to face Carlos Zambrano, but they can't avoid Rich Hill and Ted Lily. If there is any "flaw" with the current Phillies is that they occasionally struggle against left handers. They are hitting right handers with the same success, but it is much more impressive when compared to the rest of the league.

Injuries continue to take their toll. As soon as they got Howard back, Myers goes on the DL. Myers and Gordon come back and Utley breaks his hand and now Madson hurts his arm. Madson has been really good the last two months, especially in July. Hopefully they can weather the storm. If not, we can all just blame Pat Gillick. It is what I like to do.