Fixing the stupid Eagles

As evidenced by the loss to Dallas Sunday night, the Eagles are not very good right now. Of course, Dallas is an awesome team. They are a team so good that they don’t even have to help my fantasy football team and start their best running back. But if they can’t even make a game of it at home against hated rival Dallas (hated by the fans anyway), how can they compete against anyone? They are in turmoil. But what to do what to do? Addressed here are 3 common sentiments that have been read/heard in the past few days about how to fix the Eagles.

Fire Andy Reid

Perhaps this is not so crazy, and it's the only one of the 3 sentiments I can agree with. If a team with talent is not performing, the coach is usually the prime suspect as to why. But he shouldn't be let go because the BS going on with his anus-pill loving sons is limiting his ability to focus (a garbage theory), but because maybe he’s no longer capable of outcoaching his competitors. A lot of folks will tell you he never was anyway, but the fact is that the Eagles have had a good offense for much of Reid’s tenure. Now it seems though that many teams have figured his game plans out and he refuses to/can’t adapt. And then there are the accusations of stupid play calls and poor clock management, which have plagued his coaching career here. But the biggest knock on him this year, and one that is well deserved, is the ineptitude in the red zone. The Eagles rank 8th in the NFL in total yards and 20th in points. It’s a crude measurement of their non-success, but telling- and it’s also part of a 3-season trend.

Now, most of these charges have been leveled against him before around mid-season, which then resulted in a change in planning (or the planning started working well) and a late season surge into the playoffs. But with the crew they have now? This is unlikely. Even if Sacky McNabb and Co. play better (and they actually have not been as bad as many people think, other than the constant sacks), the secondary is still a mess and the special teams other than Akers make me gag like the kitten poo I’ve been cleaning up all week. But the biggest hurdle is that at 3-5, they have almost no room for error. But errors likely will be made. Like McNabb taking sacks. And playing the Patriots.

Of course if the Eagles turn it around and miraculously sneak into the playoffs, then Reid’s job will likely be safe. But if they finish 6-10 again like 2005? They’ll probably fire him, or he’ll be poisoned by an angry fan. Everyone can blame Reid’s failure on the distraction caused by his two jailbird kids, but everyone should know it’s only because Andy Reid's coaching has apparently gotten stale.

There is another option I will be called a crazy person for suggesting- instead of firing Reid, maybe they should fire Jim Johnson. The guy is hailed as a genius, but the fact is the Eagles defense has been in a decline since 2004. From 2000-2004, the Eagles were in the top 5 in points allowed every season except 2003, when they were 7th. They haven’t been in the top-10 in PA since. Last year, they ranked 6th in points scored and 15th in points allowed. Part of that is injuries and personnel changes, but good coaches deal well with those. And fire Mornigwheg too.

Bench McNabb (and trade him after the season)

Screw the benching crap. You want to bench him for a rookie who the coach you all say can’t think straight says is the QB of the future? McNabb has been hit with so many sacks this year that he’s making Lance Bass jealous, but he hasn’t been as awful as everyone thinks throwing the ball. He’s just not readjusting to his new running limitations very well. Pulling him out now will not help him if he’s ever going to learn to play well again. Regarding the trade possibilities- I hate the idea of trading a perceived superstar, as you’ll see below.

Trade Westbrook

A terrible, terrible idea. He’s the best player on the team. And they’ll never get decent value for him in a trade. A few people seem to have this dream of trading Westbrook for a massive package of draft picks, a la Herschel Walker or Ricky Williams. Not happening. Too many teams learned from those mistakes, and pulling off a big trade in the NFL is a much different proposition than in the other leagues. He also has 3 years left on his contract and is actually still underpaid based on his performance, making him worth having on their salary cap. He doesn’t even have a ton of mileage on him compared to other 6th year running backs. Trading him after this season would be more retarded than 1,000 retards acting retarded.